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Australia news, headlines, events , stories and all that is trending today

Smug Man Who Shut Down His Facebook, Frantically Looking For Way To Tell Friends And Family

Posted by on Mar 22, 2018 in Local, Satire | 0 comments

Feeling very pleased with himself after shutting down a social media service that most other people don’t have the discipline or...

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‘Think Before You Print’ Message Spills Over Onto Its Very Own Page

Posted by on Mar 20, 2018 in Local, Satire | 0 comments

A reminder about the environmental impacts of wasting paper was stylishly presented on its own piece of paper at a local office this...

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88% Of Relationships Begun by Colliding into Person Holding Stack of Files, Research Finds

Posted by on Feb 22, 2018 in Local, Satire | 0 comments

A decades long study by the University of California has found that 88% of all relationships are begun by colliding unexpectedly into a...

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Overwhelming Sense Of Self-Entitlement Now Included Standard With All SUVs

Posted by on Feb 15, 2018 in Local, Satire | 0 comments

Large luxury SUVs will soon come standard with airbags, bluetooth and an over-exaggerated desire to do whatever the f*ck works for me, it...

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Man Shaves 1.7 Seconds Off 2-Hour Flight By Standing Up As Soon As Plane Lands

Posted by on Feb 15, 2018 in Local, Satire | 0 comments

A Sydney businessman has arrived at his destination almost two full seconds before his fellow passengers, after bolting up into the aisle...

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Bernard Tomic To Become New Face of Quitline

Posted by on Jan 30, 2018 in Local, Satire | 0 comments

Aussie tennis star Barnard Tomic has been announced as the new face of Quitline, in a campaign that will give thousands of Australians the...

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Captain Cook Preferred Hottest 100 On Australia Day, Diary Entries Show

Posted by on Jan 26, 2018 in Local, Satire | 0 comments

Reigniting the debate over the date of Australia’s biggest music countdown, newly discovered diary entries show that explorer Captain...

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‘How Aussie Is This!’ Says Man Wearing Flag Made In Guangdong Province

Posted by on Jan 25, 2018 in Local, Satire | 0 comments

A man draped in a flag made in a sprawling factory on the outskirts of Guangzhou says he’s never felt more Australian. Shouting...

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Slow Car In Front To Increase Speed For Overtaking Lane

Posted by on Jan 25, 2018 in Local, Satire | 0 comments

Travelling 8 km per hour below the speed limit for the past half an hour, the car in front will accelerate for the overtaking lane, before...

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Centrelink Caller Qualifies for Aged Pension While On Hold

Posted by on Jan 23, 2018 in Local, Satire | 0 comments

A Brisbane woman who rang Centrelink to enquire about a youth allowance 38 years ago has finally had her phone call answered and is now...

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Tosser Sends Back Steak For Not Being Expensive Enough

Posted by on Dec 3, 2017 in Local, Satire | 0 comments

Gesturing to a nearby waitress and angrily pointing to his meal, Sydney wanker Hugo Samuelsson-Jones last night complained that his $16...

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Holden says future looks bright

Posted by on Oct 21, 2017 in Local, News | 0 comments

Holden says it will remain a leader in Australia’s auto sector despite the end to local manufacturing. This post is from Daily...

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Frustrating! Women STILL Don’t Understand What Mansplaining Means

Posted by on Oct 19, 2017 in Local | 0 comments

Exasperated men around the country have been at pains to point out that many women simply don’t understand what mansplaining is, despite...

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GOP May Backpedal on State and Local Taxes

Posted by on Oct 13, 2017 in Local, News, World | 0 comments

Republicans in Congress are considering tweaking their tax-overhaul plan to preserve some federal deductions for state and local taxes....

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Office Worker Rewards 12-Minute Stretch Of Work With Quick, 40-Minute Check Of Social Media

Posted by on Oct 5, 2017 in Local, Satire | 0 comments

After a solid eleven and a half minutes labouring over a spreadsheet, office worker Ben McInerny today treated himself to a quick browse...

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Halloween Costume Ideas That Are As Local as They Come

Posted by on Sep 27, 2017 in Celebrity, Local | 0 comments

There are some costumes that are going to go off around the world this Halloween (expect to see a lot of Offreds), but if you’re...

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Smoking e-Cigarettes Significantly Lowers Risk Of Looking Cool, Report Finds

Posted by on Aug 25, 2017 in Local, Satire | 0 comments

Vaping decreases the risk of contracting cancer and fitting in socially, a report has found. A preliminary study analysed users in the US,...

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Soaring House Prices Forcing Millennial Lego Figures To Live In Box Under Owner’s Bed

Posted by on Aug 22, 2017 in Local, Satire | 0 comments

An increasing number of young Lego figurines can’t even afford a simple plastic brick apartment, new research shows. As housing prices...

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“Kids Today Don’t Have A Clue,” Says Man Who Types With One Finger.

Posted by on Aug 20, 2017 in Local, Satire | 0 comments

Young people entering the workforce do not have the professional abilities required to succeed in business, a man who types emails with...

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Direct Correlation Between Shitness Of Ringtone And Time Taken To Find Phone In Handbag, Research Confirms

Posted by on Aug 8, 2017 in Local, Satire | 0 comments

The more infantile a person’s ringtone, the longer it will take them to realise the phone is theirs, search through their handbag, undo...

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